Ok, here we go. My 1st post! So I picked this picture because I couldn't find anything else that fit my mood at this time. I feel like even though my life is definitely not going as I've planned (not in school, working a menial job, broke as SHIT!) I really know who I am and I'm kinda happy about it. My life is quite boring right now cuz I don't do anything but sit at home, but it has given me a lot of time to think. Well hell what else could I do? Lol. But seriously after I got pass the depression of being so bored and poor I realized that I have some really strong values that I'm proud of having. No I'm not about to start preaching, but I just watch all my girlfriends and how they will do anything for a piece of a sorry-ass man and I am so glad that I know better. Sometimes I feel bad because I almost want to laugh at them, but it's not that I feel like I'm smarter or better than them, just, well stronger? No that's not the word. I guess it's just being raised different. I dunno. I just can't stop but feel like I'm on the verge of something breaking through in my life and I look at my friends and they act as though they're ready to go ahead and settle down...at 22!!!!!! I mean come on, this is the time of our lives. I mean I'm not exactly living it up right now but I know that things are going to change because I'm starting to understand myself a bit more. The last time I can remember feeling like this was when I graduated high school and moved into the dorms. Even though there's nothing to even compare to graduating rite now (hell I def. don't wanna talk about school! cuz I'm failing!) I'm excited. My mom told me the other day that when you feel completely lost and that you're going absolutely no where that's exactly when your life is about to change. Now usually her words do nothing but blow straight through my ears, but I have to say I think her advice came as a sign. Call me a Southern superstitious bitch, but come on! Don't that sound like somethin? So here I am, standing outside in the street, waving my freak flag and my protest sign yelling "Sam I am!". I know who I am! God that's a step right? I mean I fumbled the ball but it seems like I'm about to recover it.
Signing off and floating up,
Raquel Rox
